Karina
Ortega
Professor
Martin
English
114B
March
05, 2012
“What if”
Time-machines
do not exist, nor the possibility of living things twice in the moment. But
looking into a past and theorizing about changes that could have altered the present
is a method of going back to our history. In The Glass Castle: A Memoir by Jeannette Walls, the way Jeannette
portrays her parents with respect for the things they taught her and the gain she
received from their teachings has made her the successful woman she is today. But
furthermore, judgment and criticism, being an inevitable trait, that targets
the lack of responsibility and financial support provided by Jeannette Walls’
parents Rex and Rose Mary Walls in their roles as parents. In addition they
take these roles as a leisure activity that enables them to behave otherwise
irresponsible and careless, but loving enough to teach human survival skills
that of which help their children become successful members of society. However
one of their children becoming a misfit was a plausibility looking at their
parenting methods. But on the other hand, to what extent were these luck-of-the-pot
results guaranteed if the states had intervened and taken custody of Jeannette
and her siblings. Furthermore, through an analysis of the basic needs for a
child, does the fact that three of the four children that Rex and Rose Mary
Walls’ raised became successful adults, mean they were successful parents?
Through this essay that question will be explored.
Granted,
through Jeanette’s childhood Rex and Rose Mary Walls were liberal and carefree
with their children. But Jeanette and her siblings were exceptionally tolerant
of their parent’s choices and behaviors. Due to most of their “skedaddle”
Jeannette and her siblings were not able to call a specific place home, nor did
they have a meal everyday for dinner prepared by their mother. Instead their
parents let them wonder, and come home with scratches and bruises. In an
article called “What makes a Good Parent?” by Robert Epstein, parents are given
ten competencies that would “predict good parenting outcomes”. (49) Through
this article the first competency on the list is love and affection. (49) Point
in fact that Rex Walls, did show Jeannette and her siblings love and affection.
Throughout the book Jeannette talks about her father being there for her
although he had a drinking problem, “... Dad drank hard liquor only when we had
money, which wasn’t often, so life was mostly good in those days.” (23) She also
states how their family had financial problems throughout the book. In the list
of ten competencies, life skills, which involves providing a steady income and
plans for the future is rated as number six of the ten, a competency that the
Walls’ parents did not really enforce. (49) At this level the only competency
the Walls’ parents did enforce was number four which is autonomy and
independence, whereas they push their children to be self-sufficient and self-reliant.
(49) Aside from the neglect, and abuse they literally imposed on their
children, the fact that they involved their children with their decisions and
skewed the truth, a convenience love existed. In this case the children were
raised with Rex’s love, and Rose Mary’s emphasis on independence and autonomy.
Consequently
due to the neglect, only Lori, Brian and Jeannette became successful members of
society, whereas Maureen, the youngest of the four, did not. She was not a part
of the family as the older children were, as Jeannette put it, “She spent so
much time with the families of her friends that she often didn’t seem like a
member of our family.” (206) Jeannette, Brian, and Lori had always been with
their parents when it came time to “skedaddle” but Maureen had not really
experienced that nor was there any emphasis on the relationship she had with
her parents in any particularity. The older children had a “better”
relationship with Rex and Rose Mary Walls. The older siblings had a sense of
respect and admiration towards their parents whereas Maureen’s point of view is
not really reviewed until she has her meltdown towards the end of the book and
ends up moving to California. In this circumstance, if the state would have
intervened, maybe Maureen would have not fallen the way she did. The matter of
the truth is that there is not much that can be worked with due to the fact
that Maureen and her older siblings were raised differently.
With
this in mind, the life skills that Rex and Rose Mary lacked in the lives of
their children simultaneously pushed forth Lori, Brian, and Jeannette’s
independence. They lacked a steady income, and a meal everyday which led to
pursue their sufficiency. Consequently because of the missing necessities,
Jeannette, Brian, and Lori did their best to give the littlest of detail to Maureen.
For birthday on her seventh year the older siblings raised some money in order
to offer Maureen a birthday present. An experience that Jeannette, Lori and
Brian were not offered. The life skills that were not provided by Rex and Rose
Mary throughout their children’s lives really had do with the fact that their
budgeting skills were not satisfactory. Evidently their habits of alcoholism on
Rex’s part and being lethargic on Rose Mary’s behalf deeply impacted this
family. But those hardships, those years of hunger, and suffering were really
the foundations of the successful outcomes that Lori, Brian and Jeannette had. In
an article by The Daily Beast called “Helicopter Moms vs. Free-Range Kids” a
mother let her fourth-grade son ride a subway, and was lashed with criticism
and judgment. Much of the criticism came out because they worried for the
child’s safety. But statistics within the article stated that it has become
safer for children under 17 than it was 25 years ago. (2) There is a big
difference between letting a child go out and gain independence than that of
starving your children because a father wants to get drunk with alcoholism. But
even so with all judgment put into retrospect, Jeannette and her siblings did
become successful adults, the ideal outcome that is what every parent wants for
their child. Jeannette stated “Mom always said people worried too much about
their children.” (28) Rose Mary was right, but it is because parents want to do
things right, the right way. But all in all no one is perfect, we were all
raised differently. In “Helicopter Moms...” the fine line to determine the
space and independence offered to a child should be reviewed upon
“...developmental issues, maturity, and the psychological and emotional makeup
of that child.” (3)
In
a movie called “Pay it Forward” a
young boy named Trevor McKinney was a latchkey kid. He was a child with an
alcoholic mother, who worked two jobs, and abusive deadbeat dad nowhere to be
found, who started a movement by putting the hardships he’s had and paying them
forward to keep the favors going. The hardships that children go through are
for intentional reasons that help them mature; the important part of that
maturity is learning to deal with the hardships they endure in life.
All
things considered bad parents, good results, and successful children; the truth
of the matter is that parents are there to help a child when they need them. A
child does their homework but is prohibited to let their parents do it for
them, so all in all children must face their world alone, like did Jeannette
and her siblings, because it is a process toward maturity. The competency that
Rex and Rose Mary Walls accomplished with a major emphasis was the convenient
love, because although it is hard to accept that they loved their children
while putting them through hunger and neglect, somehow somewhere that was the
strongest variable in this equation, love. So were Rose Mary and Rex Parents of
the year? Possibilities are they would have gone to jail if these kids were
studied by the State. But the results don’t lie, and like Rose Mary said, “It’s
the Joshua tree’s struggle that gives it is beauty.” These kids struggled, and
accomplished, that’s the truth of the matter.
WORKS CITED
Epstein, Robert. "What Makes a Good
Parent?" Scientific American Mind 21.5 (2010): 46-51.
Print.
"Helicopter Moms vs. Free-Range
Kids." The Daily Beast. Newsweek/Daily Beast, 20 Apr.
2008.
Web. 04 Mar. 2012.
<http://www.thedailybeast.com/newsweek/2008/04/20/helicopter-moms-vs-free-range-kids.html>.
Pay It Forward.
Dir. Mimi Leder. By Leslie Dixon. Perf. Kevin Spacey, Helen Hunt, and Haley
Joel Osment. Warner
Bros., 2000. DVD.
Walls, Jeannette. The Glass Castle: A
Memoir. New York: Scribner, 2005. Print.
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